Disappointing Thoughts

Well, let me start by saying that I won the case on Wednesday, but not the way I thought. When I got in, a lot of things took place that I didn't think were going to take place, and once everything got sorted out, we made the right decisions and got the victory. It wasn't as satisfying for me to do it this way, on a personal level, but getting the victory is always nice. Kind of like playing heads up for massive money, and hitting a couple two outers to win it. Kind of. Not really though. Because when I hit the 2 outer, I feel like it's owed to me for all the bad beats.

But the disappointing thoughts lately really stem from that run in the daily dollar. I reviewed the hand again and it's clear that I flat made the wrong decision. for the amount of chips it was worth, I had clearly just made a snap decision while being really tired and after having a couple cocktails. A friend was over and we agreed to split half our winnings with each other, and it's clear to me that my play probably disappointed him more than me, since he was eager to get his hands on his $5 share of the amount I actually won.

I should post the hand, although it's like if someone pissed in your coffee, recorded you drinking it, and then put the video of it on youtube. Basically, I had 500k chips at 600/1200. Reeeediculous for me call an all in on the flop - or any flop - without the absolute mutha f'n nuts.

I think to myself if I was in the main event of the WSOP (which had a smaller field size than the tourney I was in) would I make the same play? I say no. Because you actually have to physically move the chips in, which takes much more deliberate action than just button clicking.

Even if I had simply walked away from the keyboard and just played aces, I probably could have finished in the teens.

I think about the moments in retrospect all the time, but of course for whatever reason, I keep doing it when I get into the moment. Just not able to find the fold button. Something is wrong with me, I think. I get into a moment where I get impulsive and do not act totally rationally. I need to work on this.